* THOTS & HUMOR- 2006*
- It is a good rule in life never to apologise.
- The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.
- Technology is the art of arranging the world in such a way that we do not feel the need to experience it.
- In science, the credit goes to the man who convinces the world, not to the man to whom the idea first occurs.
- Drinking when we are not thirsty and making love at all seasons, that is the only difference between humans and animals.
- When you don’t have any money, the problem is food. When you have money, it’s sex. When you have both, it’s health.
- Sleep is good, death is better; but of course, the best thing would be never to have been born at all.
- I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.
- Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
- The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
- If you want to make God laugh, tell him your future plans.
- The secret of a good speech is to have a good beginning and a good ending, and having the two as close together as possible.
- Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
- Nowadays, advertisements contain the only truths to be relied on in a newspaper.
- If you can tell the difference between good advice and bad advice, you don’t need advice.
- The strongest man upon earth is he who stands most alone.
- The artist does not see things as they are, but as he is.
- Beauty is eternity gazing at itself in a mirror.
- The most beautiful things in the world are the most useless; peacocks and lilies, for example.
- A book is a success when people who haven’t read it pretend they have.
- The advantage of being clever is that it’s easy to play the fool. The opposite is much more difficult.
- Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone may be looking.
- We enact many laws that manufacture criminals, and then a few that punish them.
- An expert is a man who doesn’t know all the answers, but is sure, that if he is given enough money, he can find them.
- Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
- The future is the past, returning through another gate.
- Our generation never had a chance. When we were young they taught us to respect our elders, and now that we’re older, they tell us to listen to youth.
- By the time a man realises that may be his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.
- One reason that history repeats itself is that so many people were not listening the first time.
- In a war of ideas, it is people who get killed.
- My life is in the hands of any fool who can make me lose my temper.
- Life is like the Olympics; a few men strain their muscles to carry off a prize; others sell ice cream and souvenirs to the crowd, and some look at the show and see how and why everything is done.
- Love is an ocean of emotions, entirely surrounded by expenses.
- What is mind? No matter. What is matter? Never mind.
- How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you happen to be.
- Only some of us can learn by other people’s mistakes. The rest of us have to be the other people.